Oh Canada.

This world has gone absolutely crazy. 

Every day it is something new and absurd and mystifying.   From scaling the White House fence (twice in a month) to the disappearance of 43 students in Mexico, or even shooting guards in the Capitol in Canada - it is always something new.  Terrorists posing threats, U.S. administering air-strikes on ISIS, deadly viruses sneaking their way from country to country, Russia being...well... Russia.  Everywhere seems to have something completely insane going on.  Maybe I am paying closer attention, but I don't think so.  I have listened to NPR every morning for two years.  I have never felt this anxious about "what is next?"

My complaints are small on the grand scale.  I whine that I don't make enough money or that I work multiple jobs and am still broke.  I complain that I want to make more of this life than I have already. Sometimes I forget the important things.  Sometimes I forget that something as simple as standing in the sun and feeling the warmth on my face is enough.  That breathing my lungs full of air and making myself feel refreshed and revived is satisfying.  I don't really need more than I am actually given.

Yesterday I got to make so many memories.  Alanna and I traveled to a new place and saw old things. We climbed the side of a flood plain and stuck our hands in natural clay that is 400 millions years old.
We ruined our shoes and got mud everywhere.
We peed in a stream - and on my sunglasses when they fell in.
We climbed a sand dune until our legs felt like jelly. Then we tumbled down the other side.
I had a very large spider run across my foot.
We ate Canadian White Cheddar popcorn which was somehow better than the American version.
We listened to a French radio station and pretended to sing-a-long like we knew the words.
We found nuggets of pyrite on the shore of Lake Huron on an Indian Reservation.
I never used my phone other than to take a few pictures.
I fell in love with nature.
I spent time with my girl.
I gave myself a break from the craziness of every day and found a little piece of peace.

This will happen more often because I will it so.

I am glad for my little moments, because they get to become great big moments... eventually.

My Birthday Reminder

Sometimes life gives us little reminders at the most perfect moments.

Today my reminder came in the form of a phone call.

My daughter's school called to inform me that my daughter was involved in an incident with a male student.  While in science class, he used his rubber glove to smack her ass. Twice.  After she asked him to stop the first time.  Once class ended she reported it to her counselor.  

If you think that is harsh then you are a moron.  My daughter is brave for not putting up with that kind of nonsense.  

The school counselor called to relay the incident to me and to commend Alanna for being wise enough to know that it needed to be reported.  I explained to the counselor that we have been having discussions on "proper behavior" a lot recently.  How boys at 12-years old act a lot more sexual than girls at 12-years old and they will do all kinds of things to get their kicks in.

Like "You can't leave til you give me a hug..."  I remember those hugs.  They were a cheap thrill for the boys to feel your boobs up against them.
Alanna had to give 4 different hugs out this past weekend. She knows now what that is all about. 

And then came my birthday present:

While I am paraphrasing, it went like something to the effect of "You are doing something right with your daughter." and "Kids just don't report things anymore and half the time we don't know when things like this happen."  and "The fact that your daughter still talks to you speaks volumes about what an amazing job you are doing with her. Most kids at 12 have stopped telling their parents things."  An amazing job.  On my own. Wow.

I was stunned.  And smiling.  My daughter had been sexually harassed and I knew she would have reacted perfectly.  I know because she doesn't take shit from men.
She has twice threatened the life of boys who have messed with her.  

I know when it comes to her heart, one day she will be the perfect amount of guarded and naive.  She will know exactly what she wants and how to obtain it.

I often hear people say that "broken kids come from broken homes" and that "a kid cannot be completely well raised by a single parent." Well fuck you to all those people.
My straight-A student has one of the best heads on her shoulders I have ever known. She is the perfect amount of funny, beautiful, wise, and temperamental to make her a dangerous force to be reckoned with one day.

My girl on her 12th birthday, heading off to school!

And at 32 years old, she has given me one hell of a compliment.